Friday, July 31, 2015

I never thought...

Things would come to this.

It is one thing to be mildly in trouble. PhD woes are enough to keep the back of the mind busy in planning wildly, and ignoring wildly. The brain sifts through massive traumatic ideas, their implementations, their unhappy outcomes and the resulting verbal ramifications. As the outer self watches "Zack and Cody", laughing at the witty comebacks and ludicrous scenes, the inner self cringes at the latest verbal confrontation, or the unpleasant finding of the day in which one realizes that their brilliant idea has not only be thought of by multiple people, but it has been analyzed and implemented in top conferences with multiple citations.

That, it itself, is quite enough.

It is a totally different thing to be so extremely worried, that now the eyes stare blankly at Mr. Mosby's hilarious acting, while the inner self spins out of control, trying out wild theories of survival and coming up with nothing. This is, I guess, a procrastinating "survival mode".

An oxymoron, if there ever was one.

May Allah Help us in times of trouble. Ameen.