Monday, September 12, 2011

Disappointment of the Day...


I feel like writing in points. No, I shouldn't... **tells herself firmly**

Somehow, I'm disconnected from writing. Although I shouldn't be. I should be so INTO writing that I somehow should complete writing my thesis in about..


Thesis. A whole BOOK. What have I been doing up till now ?

Not to mention, in the meeting today, the supervisor (henceforth called SS), asked me to hunt around for conferences. Now, why would I have been disappointed at that. I should jump at any conference opportunity. The convo went like this:

SS: You interested in conferences?
Me: Yes!
SS: International ones!?
Me: Of course, why not? But er, if they accept..
SS: You can go out of the country?
Me: *surprised*, why not, Sir?
SS: Because the university has no funding for MS students. Only for the faculty, and the PhD students.

SS: **after a prolonged silence, in which he kind of understood that I'm not able to dole out 1-1.5lakh rupees for a conference on my own** ... But you can go to a local one
Me: Any would do, really. When one is at coordinate (0,0), even (0.01, 0.01) is a start. [thought that last bit to myself, didn't say it]
SS: Well, here is one. Here you can get published. [and he showed me the conference page of a local one]
Me: Oh, will I get published here?
SS: 90% chances, that you will.
Me: *skeptically*, really? But.. how can you be so sure?
SS: Well, you see, conferences are a business - right?
Me: Err, yeah?
SS: Of course! You accept as many papers as possible, hold a conference, get your cost of hosting covered by the registered presenters! After all, you have to invite the keynote speakers, give them air travel, accommodations, give everybody gifts... how would you cover all this cost?
Me: *silent*.. Okay.
SS: So basically, reviewers who know each other, won't really refuse the paper. It's a business and friendship thing. Works everywhere.
Me: Sure.

So much for 'original research, contributing to the field and to science, and to human-kind' ..

I'm so disappointed today. It's like, academics is staring back at me with a smirk and saying, 'Aur ghusso iss tableau mein.. samjh nahi aya ab tak that it's all a game?'


Tazeen said...

It frustrates me most when they do not have funds/proper career opportunities for us i.e. the "pioneers of the future". Two years into university and I've been disappointed so much that I do not like to hear the words "scholarship" or "sponsorship" or even "application". I'm not sure whether my rant is related to this post or not but I just wanted to take it out. =/

Uni said...

You're in a better department right now, trust me. Engineering institutes are worse off. There is ONLY one ambition related to research here - to get as much publications as possible, and that too, in the crappiest journals/conferences in the world. It's weird. Wasting time on the stupidest things, seems to be the favorite thing to do these days.

I'm glad I'm nearly out of here :(. But it doesn't feel so nice to have spent 6.5 years here and THEN say that!

Best of luck!

Tazeen said...

I know. That does sound sadder. :(

May Allah help you (and me too).

Glow said...

its not entirely liek ur sup described it!!! i have seen papers being rejected of very renowned scientists!! but i am sure you have done some really good work :)

Uni said...

Yeah I have heard about these things too. But no, I seriously haven't. And I'm not even being harsh or anything.

There is just nothing quite like a good university. One thing I have learned the real hard way.

Thanks for dropping by.