Friday, September 30, 2011

Why Your Heart Should Be Attached to The Mosque?

“There are seven whom Allâh will shade in His shade on the day on which there is no shade except His shade;

a just imam, a youth who grows up worshipping Allâh, a man whose heart is attached to the mosque when he leaves it until he returns to it, two who love each other for the sake of Allâh and part on that, a man who remembers Allâh when he is alone and his eyes overflow with tears, a man who refuses the approaches of a noble, beautiful woman, saying ‘I fear Allâh,’ and a man who gives charity and conceals it so that his left hand does not know what his right hand gives.”
[Reported by Al-Bukhaaree and Muslim. The text is that of Al-Bukhaaree: Saheeh Al-Bukhaaree, V.1, Hadeeth #629.]

Is your heart attached to the mosque?

What do you think about when you see your local mosque?

What about when you see photos of mosques around the world?  How do you feel? Are you reminded of beautiful architecture, towering minarets, and the melodic sound of the call to prayer? Do you imagine lines of the faithful believers praying in comfortable companionship? Can you hear the sounds of silence?
The mosque is all of those things, and feeling a special attachment should be easy. It is a place of serenity occupied not only by people but also by angels. The architecture ranges from Islamic classical to new state of the art designs. Inside the mosque you might find columns, spiral staircases, plush carpets and Arabic calligraphy. Outside there are domes and minarets, drinking fountains and shoe racks. Mosques are as different as Muslims, they come in all shapes and sizes however in one way they are all exactly the same; a place in which Muslims worship Allâh.

About the Mosque

Muslim men are expected, under normal circumstances, to pray the five obligatory prayers in a mosque, and although women are also permitted to do this, it is not obligatory upon them. It is in quiet, tranquil mosques that Muslims fulfill the right of Allâh to be worshipped, but they can also gather rewards and good deeds for the hereafter. Praying in the mosque and being attached to the mosque is a very pious and rewardable action.

Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, continually reminded his followers that Allâh loves and rewards those who find repose and comfort in the mosques: “When a person goes to the mosques for prayer and the remembrance of Allâh, Allâh, the Most High, greets him joyfully, just as the family of one who is absent greets him with joy when he returns to them.” [Reported by Ibn Abee Shaybah, Ibn Maajah, Ibn Khuzaimah and others and it is found in Saheehit-Targheeb (no. 315)]  “The mosque is the house of every pious person, and Allâh has granted comfort and mercy for everyone for whom the mosque is his house, and that they will easily traverse the bridge to Allâh’s Paradise.” [Reported by at-Tabaraanee in al-Kabeer and al-Awsat and al-Bazzaar who declared it hasan, and it occurs in Saheehut-Targheeb (no. 328)]

“There are six places in which a person is guaranteed the safekeeping of Allâh, the Most High, as long as he is in one of them. In a congregational mosque, with a sick person, at a funeral, in his house, with a just ruler whom he supports and treats with respect, or at a place where people are fighting jihad.”  [Declared hasan by Shaykh al-Albaanee in Saheehut-Targheeb (no. 326) and is reported by at-Tabaraanee and al-Bazzaar.]

“The comforting feeling that comes from pleasing Allâh, and even more rewards, can be obtained by cleaning or building mosques.  Aisha, the beloved wife of Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, said that her husband often reminded the people that Allâh commanded that mosques be built among the houses and that they be kept clean and perfumed.”  [Sunan Abu Dawood, Hadith no. 455]
“Whoever builds a mosque seeking the pleasure of Allâh, Allâh builds a similar one for him in paradise.” “Whoever builds for the Mighty and Majestic Allâh a mosque, even if it be very small, Allâh builds for him a house in paradise.” [Bukhari & Muslim: #450; #553]

“Once, while they were building a mosque, a companion of Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, noticed him carrying a heavy piece of mortar.  He offered to carry it but Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, reminded him that there was no better living then in Paradise and suggested he carry his own piece of mortar for this noble cause.”

Angels & Blessings
Comfort, peace, tranquility, good companionship, angels and rewards can all be found in mosques and they are also among the best places on earth.

In the traditions of Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, we can find the story of a woman who cleaned and picked up rubbish in the mosque. Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, did not learn of her death until he did not notice her, so he inquired about her. He said to his companions, “If one of you dies inform me!”  He then prayed the funeral prayer for her and said, “I saw her in Paradise! She was rewarded for cleaning the mosque.”

Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, also reminded his followers that “After the believer dies, he is followed by some of his work and good deeds including knowledge that he taught and spread, leaving a pious child (who would supplicate Allâh for his father or mother), a Qur’an book he bequeathed, a mosque he built, a house he built for the wayfarer, a river he caused to flow, or charity extracted from his wealth during his life while in good health.”

Comfort, peace, tranquility, good companionship, angels and rewards can all be found in mosques and they are also among the best places on earth. Prophet Muhammad,  peace be upon him, said: the most beloved places to Allâh are the mosques, and the most hated places are the markets. [Sahih Muslim]
Mosques are special places filled with blessings and rewards, however, Allâh has conferred a special blessing upon the nation of Muslims, the whole earth has been declared a mosque, so when the time for prayer comes and a believer is unable to pray in congregation in a building he may pray wherever he may be.

The companion Abu Dharr, may Allah be pleases with him, asked Prophet Muhammad,  peace be upon him, “What was the first mosque on the earth?”

He answered: “The Masjid Al-Haram [in Makkah].”
Abu Dharr then asked: “Which is the next oldest mosque?”
The Prophet said: “The Al-Aqsa Mosque.”
Abu Dharr asked: “How much time was there between building the two mosques?”
The Prophet replied: “Forty years.” Then he said, “Wherever you may be at the time of prayer you may pray, for it (the earth) is all a place for prayer.”
[Bukhari: Book 4 Volume 55 Hadith 585]

By Aisha Stacey
Muslim Writer
Source: The Religion of Islam -

Tuesday, September 27, 2011


Is (Insha Allah multiplied by thousand) my last night in the hospital. I hadn't imagined that this day would come so soon - it looked endless back on Wednesday :).. But Alhamdulillah, the glad day (of departure from this place) is tomorrow. We are going back home... where there is no big screen LCD TV, no AC (continuous), loadshedding (4 times a day), bedroom fridge, dinner/lunch/breakfast trays, no room service.. ETC.

And we can't be happier about it :)

This happiness stems from a general relief that everything is a-okay and a profound gratefulness to the Creator and Sustainer, Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala... for so many things, but particularly:

1. The surgery went well
2. There were no anaesthesia complications
3. The patient woke up and still saw herself on the planet, when she opened her eyes [:D]..
4. The attendant was lousy, but still managed to make the patient satisfied (almost)
5. The doctors pronounced the post-op situation to be a-okay and will get the patient dc [discharged] from hospital tomorrow.
6. That the patient is now getting up, walking about, on her own :)

And so many other things, Alhamdulillah.

With the relief, comes a heavy burden though... a burden whose roots lies in the shortcomings in a human, that emerge during the toughest times. Shortcomings like shortness of temper, lousy mood, crankiness, emotional upheavals, tears and tantrums, fuzool kee arguments and what not. Today me and the patient were literally yowling at each other. May Allah Forgive me :(:(

The whole point is, that the guilt weighs heavy on the heart, but there is no end to the extent of kindness and patience shown by people (especially family and close friends) to the attendant especially. There has been abundant idiocies during this week, quite a few arguments, and not to mention a lot of panic attacks on my part :(.. Why, you may ask?

1. Thesis submission deadline is in a month or so IA - have partially written the first chapter
2. One module (whole and the most tough) hasn't been implemented yet, not much reading done either about it... no idea what's going to happen.
3. One previous module which was working, suddenly has stopped working and I still haven't figured out why and how!
4. The whole past week was spent doing nothing, but sitting around, worrying, and having negative thoughts. Whenever I sat to work, nothing much happened.

Problem: My heart isn't in my work - and my brain keeps screaming at it to shut it and just WORK...

Wish it were this easy.
The negative spiral I found myself in the past few days, just blew out of control, despite my fierce attempts to contain it - sanity vs urge to burst out ... the problem with bursting out is that you announce to the world that you're stupid (pehlay, only you know it), and secondly - you hurt people, something you never intended to do.

So long folks.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Title? Can't Think Of One

Assalamualaikum !

Convo  of the day:

Me: *sigh*, I feel like I've done nothing. Sitting around in the room - food being sent to me and all... what a life. *sigh again*
She:  *quietly*.. you feel that you've done nothing?
Me: Course.
She: You're wrong. You have done a LOT. Done this this, that that..etc
Me: So??
She: SO??
Me: Yeah! So? Remember when I was an infant?
She: *stared in amazement*...
Me: And when electricity went out at night? (with  no UPS), didn't you fan me.. for loooong times??
She: *no answer*
Me: So I've done nothing..

:D:D --end of convo

So these days I have no idea of dates, times and days of the week. Everything is one big cycle - with mini-cycles within it. I try not to glance at the clock to much as well. Although have to keep track of Flagyl and Falgan's timings!

With 3 hours of sleep in the past 24 hours (again!), life seems hazy.. and I feel like one big tablet of..

You know, I seriously think I should have gone in nursing.. :S.. *wistfully*. I would have LOVED to 'do rounds', interact with so many different patients, cheer them up in their dormicum-induced-and-flagyl-induced gloom, and well, it would just have been plain fun (and work!).

Too late .. :(

Friday, September 23, 2011

Hotel Rooms vs Hospital Rooms

The kind of day today was, the only thing my beyond exhausted brain can come up with at the moment is a comparison b/w hotel rooms and hospital rooms.

Yeah, the exhausted brain can sleep no? Sigh. I wish. Yeah so hospital rooms vs hotel ones.

Similarities :

1. Nice views. The room I was in yesternight had the most amazing view of .. er, clouds. I could lie in bed and stare up for ages. And er, if I looked down, it was kutchi abaadis.. :(. Made me feel worse about being in a hotel-room-like-hospital-room.

2. Attached baths with soaps and towels provided by ... hotels/hospitals.

3. Flat screen TVs in the rooms.

4. ACs, cool furniture..

5. Room service!

6. There is an arrow showing qiblah direction.. :)

Differences now

1. Hotel: People knock before entering, and wait after a knock!
Hospital: People enter without knocking, and if the door is locked, they knock louder.

2. Hotel: people enter and they usually serve you something
Hospital: People enter usually to prick you with yet another needle, change the drip, or take BP

3. Hotel: If some guest comes to visit to your room, they sit and talk and laugh
Hospital: Visitors come, and talk in hushed tones, all the time glancing at the knocked-out-with-heavy-drugs person on the bed with anxiety...You automatically whisper.

4. Hotel: The bed never has steps to climb up on it...the bed also never has a lever thing which can be turned to shift the bed up/down...

5. Hotel room: You normally wouldn't feel like crying in one.

6. Hotel Room: You normally wouldn't be missing the person lying not 5 feet away from you...[er, maybe in the movies]

I think I'm done. I slept for only 2 hours last night. And took a 30-min snooze in the afternoon today. No sleep... Got to sleep..

**speaking nonsense now**...

**gets away fast**...

Dua'as needed!

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Of Hospitals And Stuff :(


I always thought I was a brave-hearted woman of the world.


I am sitting on an attendant's bed right now, with the patient's bed right in front of me. We happen to be in a private room, and supposedly with all the amenities of life.

Isn't sukoon-e-qalb an amenity of life?

Apparently, an attached bath, a TV, fridge, toothbrush and toothpaste and water bottle count towards the amenities of life. Sigh.

I'm heck scared. And there is no respite till at least a week from now on. Both my parents are doctors. Both my phuppos are doctors. When we sit around the dining table, conversation easily fluctuates between the dirty game of politics and the (even dirtier) mention of 'cases' and their 'complications' .. not to mention how to 'resolve them' techniques.

I'm well familiar with words such as cannula, IV lines, anaesthesia, GA, local, etc etc. Doesn't mean I'm all comfortable when its being discussed over somebody who is so dear to me.

**sick with worry**

Please all - say Ameen to:

Let the patient get well sooner than ever, let there be no side-effects of any medicine, let the anaesthesia portion go well and smooth, and let the recovery process be steady and without any major hitches.


Tuesday, September 20, 2011

A Deed So Special, Yet So Easy!

Would you like to know of a deed.....
that will take you away from Hellfire a distance of seventy years? And every single time you do it, it takes you away another seventy years!
.....A deed that will act as a shield for you from Hell Fire and be an intercessor for you on the Day of Resurrection?!
.....A deed that is so beloved to Allaah that He said: "It is for Me and I will reward him for it (beyond measure).” (Bukhari – Hadith Qudsi)
Subhaan Allaah! What a wonderful deed that would surely be!
That deed, dear brother/sister is....fasting. 
Our beloved Prophet (sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) said: “No servant fasts a day for the sake of Allah except that Allah removes the hellfire seventy years away from his face.” (Muslim)
And he (sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) also said: “The fast and the Qur'aan are two intercessors for the servant of Allah on the Day of Resurrection. The fast will say: ‘O Lord, I prevented him from his food and desires during the day. Let me intercede for him.’ The Qur'aan will say: ‘I prevented him from sleeping at night. Let me intercede for him.’ And their intercession will be accepted.” (Ahmad-saheeh)
But, mind you, I am not talking about fasting in the month of Ramadhaan. Obviously that fasting is fard on us and we really don't have much choice in that matter. 
What I am talking about is the 'nafl' fast....the fast that is purely voluntary....... not because you have to fast. But because you want to fast......because you love to fast....for the sake of Allaah...just to please Him.
And if you do that, sincerely, for His sake, this nafl fasting will bring you closer to Allaah and earn his Great Pleasure and Love. It will also be a means to purify your soul and strive against your desires, while earning immense reward from Allaah, Subhaanahu wa Ta'ala.
Allaah says: “My slave does not draw near to Me with anything more beloved to Me than the religious duties I have enjoined upon him, and My slave continues to draw near to Me with supererogatory works so that I will love him, When I love him, I am his hearing with which he hears, he seeing with which he sees, his hand with which he strikes and his foot with which he walks. Were he to ask [something] of Me, I would surely give it to him, and were he to ask Me for refuge, I would surely grant him it.” (al-Bukhaari-Hadeeth Qudsi). 
Subhaan Allaah! Imagine....Allaah loving you.....yes, you! What more could a person ask for?!!!
That's for the Dunya. And what about the Aakhirah? This fasting will take you to Jannah, the Ultimate Goal, the Supreme Success.
Abu Umamah said: “I came to the Messenger of Allah (sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) and said: ‘Order me to do a deed that will allow me to enter Paradise.’ He said: ‘Stick to fasting, as there is no equivalent to it.‘ Then I came to him again and he said: ‘Stick to fasting.”‘ (an-Nasa’ee--saheeh)
The Prophet (sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) used to love to fast, especially on Mondays and Thursdays. When asked why he does that, he (sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) said:
“Those are two days on which people’s deeds are shown to the Lord of the Worlds, and I want my deeds to be shown to Him when I am fasting.” (al-Nasaa’i, Ibn Maajah, Ahmad-- saheeh by al-Albaani)
Wouldn't you like your deeds to be shown to Allaah while you are fasting?
And if you find it difficult to fast every Monday and Thursday, then try and fast at least three days out of every month. It is recommended to fast on the thirteenth, fourteenth and fifteenth (Ayyam al-Beed) of every Lunar month. However, if it is difficult, then fast any three days in the entire month. And that means any three days out of thirty. Now that's not too it?!!
The Prophet (sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) said: “Fasting three days of each month is fasting for a lifetime, and ayaam al-beed are the thirteenth, fourteenth and fifteenth.” (al-Nasaa’i-- saheeh by al-Albaani)
Someone asked Aaisha (RA) :"Did the Messenger of Allaah (sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) fast three days of every month?” She said, “Yes.” They asked: “Which days of the month did he fast?” She said, “He did not mind which days of the month he would fast.” (Muslim)
And if you think about it, it's really not that hard at all. With a little patience and the hope of earning reward, one can easily get used to fasting. Alhamdulillaah we fasted a whole month in Ramadhaan. And we proved to ourselves during this month, that we can do everything, from going to work, to working in the kitchen, studying, driving, thinking, cooking, cleaning, in fact, doing all our duties and chores extremely effectively even while fasting. And if we can do all that while fasting for an entire month, what's a couple of days in a week or three days in a month?

Amir ibn Abdullah was once asked, "How can you tolerate being awake all night, and thirsty in the intense heat of the day?"  He replied, "Is it anything more than postponing the food of the day to nighttime, and the sleep of the night to daytime?  This is not a big matter." 
Al-Fudayl ibn ‘Ayaad said: “If you cannot pray qiyaam al-layl, or fast during the day, know that you are indeed deprived and restricted, chained by your sins.”
It is also Sunnah to fast the day of ‘Aashoora’ (tenth of Muharram), the day of ‘Arafaah, (ninth of Dhu’l-Hijjah), the six days of Shawwaal, most of the months of Muharram and Sha'baan, along with general voluntary fasting.
So do as the Prophet (sal Allaahu Alaiyhi wa Sallam) advised us and make the most of your time, young age and good health before it is gone: 
“Make the most of five things before five (other things happen): your life before you die, your good health before you become sick; your free time before you become busy; your youth before you grow old; and your wealth before you become poor.”  (saheeh by al-Albaani)
“And march forth in the way (which leads to) forgiveness from your Lord, and for Paradise as wide as the heavens and the earth, prepared for Al-Muttaqoon (the pious)” [Aal ‘Imraan 3:133] 

Friday, September 16, 2011

Islam can exist with democracy, says Erdogan

TUNIS: Tunisia’s new political order will show that Islam and democracy can co-exist just as they have in Turkey, Turkish Prime Minister Tayyip Erdogan said on Thursday.

Erdogan, in Tunis on the second stop of a North African tour aimed at asserting Ankara’s growing regional influence, said secularism should guarantee that people of all beliefs, as well as atheists, were treated fairly.

He said there was nothing to stop a Muslim from governing a secular state.

Tunisia plans to hold elections on Oct 23 to select an assembly to rewrite the constitution, nine months after the revolt that swept away President Zine al-Abidine Ben Ali and sparked uprisings around the Arab world.

Islamist party Ennahda, banned for two decades under Ben Ali, is expected to poll strongly, unnerving Tunisian secularists. Erdogan said the country should have nothing to fear from the influence of Islam in politics.

“The most important thing of all, and Tunisia will prove this, (is that) Islam and democracy can exist side by side,” he told a joint news conference with counterpart Beji Caid Sebsi.

“Turkey, as a country which is 99 per cent Muslim, does this comfortably, we do not have any difficulty. There is no need to hinder this by putting forward different approaches. In the broadest sense, consultation will put forward the will of the people,” he said.

More than 90 political parties have sprung up in Tunisia since Ben Ali’s fall. Ennahda is seen with around 20 percent in the polls.

“Tunisia and Turkey confirm that there is no contradiction between Islam and democracy,” Sebsi, a secularist, said.

AL QAEDA THREAT: Erdogan has been holding up Turkey’s blend of Islam and democracy as a model for the movements which have toppled entrenched Arab autocrats in Tunis, Cairo and Tripoli.

“On the subject of secularism, this is not a secularism in the Anglo-Saxon or western sense. A person is not secular, the state is secular,” Erdogan said.

“A Muslim can govern a secular state in a successful way.”

Sebsi said they had discussed the relation between religion and the state as well as ways to fight security threats in a turbulent region — with a reference to Al Qaeda.

Tunisian officials have warned that Al Qaeda could be exploiting the Libyan conflict to acquire weapons and smuggle them into other countries. Tunisia arrested several men with suspected links to the group’s North African branch near the border earlier this year. After Erdogan received a rapturous welcome in Cairo this week, hundreds of Tunisians turned out to greet the Turkish premier at Tunis airport late on Wednesday, clutching portraits of him and hoisting banners reading “Welcome Erdogan!”

Ennahda leader Rachid Ghannouchi joined the crowds, praising Erdogan as someone who had “worked hard for Islam”.

Ennahda, a moderate Islamist movement which has close ties with Erdogan’s AK Party, has said Turkey’s political model is something it aspires to—Reuters

Source: Daily Dawn
Several questions arose in my exhausted brain after reading this. I've got the worst toddler-hangover (if there is such a thing) in the history of hangovers! And it didn't help when I read this piece too, take a look:  

Arabs to avoid targeting Israel at UN atom meeting  
VIENNA: Arab states will refrain from targeting Israel over its assumed nuclear arsenal at a global meeting of UN atomic agency member countries next week, diplomats said on Thursday, an unexpected gesture of restraint sure to be welcomed by the West. [Source: Daily Dawn]

Unexpected gesture of restraint?? More like predictably disgusting gesture of spinelessness! I feel like punching something. Bad.

Anyway, this Islam with democracy question. It's been on my mind a lot, and reading this only cropped further questions in my mind. There are quite a few people now who say that Erdogan's version of political Islam doesn't really simulate the political Islam which had been introduced in Medina, and brought forward till the Ottomans. The political system that PM Erdogan has implemented in Turkey is a western system, only that he's trying to make it wear Islam's clothing.

Having said that, there is a vast majority of people who think that Erdogan has brought a revolutionary change in Turkey, because this was the center of the destruction of the Ottoman Empire, and converted into a completely secular state. Once the Ottoman Empire was lost, nothing could be done to bring back Turkey to practice Islam for its citizens. Except what Erdogan has done now. Based on the foundation laid by Arbakan.

[Did anybody know Arbakan was an engineer ? *grin*]

Khair. The question is: Which of the two points of view are true? If Turkey was afraid of even calling people to salah (giving adhan), at one time, is it not a big change what Turkey is, right now? If Ataturk had followed a completely secular model, then is it not a change that the Turkish rulers are the only ones now, openly challenging Israel?

On the other hand, what in the world does Erdogan mean when he says, 'A person is not secular, the state is secular'.


My quest for answers continues :(.

So long folks.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Memories :)

It's a well known fact that sights, sounds, smells, anything really (even a whiff of a certain perfume) has the ability to trigger one's neurons and retrieve a portion of memory that you may have thought you remembered.

But the human brain (and heart!) are both amazing things. Layers upon layers of complexities, we are only just beginning to grasp now. Here are some nasheeds which bring a smile on the face, a lil jig of the heart, a lil sniff of nostalgia, a certain train of thought, a handful of close friends' gatherings, some lunches, a trip which can never be forgotten, unforgettable car rides, including GoKart, sea view and hawksbay, sand and its muddiness, gravel and its hardness, and sights and sounds associated closely with all of them, and more.

Uff, I'm in love with the video.. :$. And by the way: here is a note from Zain Bhika Studio which I'm thinking is useful to post here :P.. Just to re-confirm once again, "First We Need The Love" contains no musical instruments, not even drums. All sounds that you hear are generated using voice and vocal beats, all done live in studio. The song has over 100 tracks of vocals combined to give it this unique sound. We really hope this clears things up. Sincerely, Zain Bhikha Studios

This last one is the one whose lyrics I am posting below. I think this is what we women should aim for, should keep as the yardstick - it's one HUGE yardstick, but maybe we can be a fraction of this .. in the future, Insha Allah. Contemplate :) - the first time I heard it, my eyes couldn't remain dry.


He stepped inside his home, and He was overwhelmed with fear
An angel came with words from God, things were still unclear
Saying read - read, but he could not read,
Amazing words he heard
A trembling deep inside his heart, confused by what had occurred

And there was only one who could comfort him
And help him see the light
To ease his fears, to reassure It was Khadijah, his wife...
He said Zamilooni, Zamilooni, Dathirooni, Dathirooni,
A mighty task has come before me... I need you here with my side...

She was a woman of nobility, successful in all her trade
Many wealthy men had asked for her, she had turned them all away
But when she saw Muhammad, a shining moon, may peace be on his soul
He was a light for her -- so right for her -- her life will now be whole

But she had never seen him so distressed, as he was there that day
She would comfort him, and hold him tight, and chase his doubts away
He said Zamilooni, Zamilooni, Dathirooni, Dathirooni, A mighty task has come before me... I need you here with my side...

We look for stories of love, in places dark and cold
When we have a guiding light, for the whole world to behold
But were so selfish in our ways, and to the ones we hold so close
Our own pleasure and happiness is what we value most

But she sacrificed all her wealth and everything she had
and he honoured her and gave her faith, when the times were bad, when times were bad

Now years have passed, times had changed, since Khadijah breathed her last.
and the message of the one true God was spreading far and vast
But then he came across some jewellery, that Khadijah once had worn
His eyes began to swell with tears, his heart again began to mourn
Cause she was there for him, when times were rough, and his enemies were cruel
Was the first Believer, so keen and eager, to comfort Al-Rasool
when He said: Zamilooni, Zamilooni Dathirooni, Dathirooni A mighty task has come before me... I need you here with my side...  

Brought to you by Halal Dawa Records-provisions for the seekers. [Trying to fulfill your halal nasheed, lecture and childrens education needs]

Silliness in the Rain

A poem i wrote last night...when the rain was lashing down in fury, lightening kept on illuminating my dark room, and I unsuccessfully tried to sleep :S

As the skies cry with me
Torrential tears
No storm no wind can ease
My inherent fears

The rain lashes my conscience
Hard and painfully
The lightening flashes and i try
Not to see, too deeply

Thunder booms, a crashing sound
Did something break?
Was it something mend-able, or
Was it just fake?

We brave the storm but hard it is
To brave the internal one
The heart cries, its tears unknown
Nowhere, is the sun

The city is drowning, sindh is in trouble
Is anybody listening
Or they're too busy singing songs and speeches
Thunderous slander, booming

Let them sing their merry songs, let them dance away
As we drown in our miserable mess, let them turn away
And when election comes, put your soul-less thumb
And vote for them anyway

The poem turned political, the rain just stopped
Is it finally over?
The swishing sound of drain-water continues
The rainy, tearful remnants still hover..

Copyright Uni Stupidoony 2011

Monday, September 12, 2011

Disappointment of the Day...


I feel like writing in points. No, I shouldn't... **tells herself firmly**

Somehow, I'm disconnected from writing. Although I shouldn't be. I should be so INTO writing that I somehow should complete writing my thesis in about..


Thesis. A whole BOOK. What have I been doing up till now ?

Not to mention, in the meeting today, the supervisor (henceforth called SS), asked me to hunt around for conferences. Now, why would I have been disappointed at that. I should jump at any conference opportunity. The convo went like this:

SS: You interested in conferences?
Me: Yes!
SS: International ones!?
Me: Of course, why not? But er, if they accept..
SS: You can go out of the country?
Me: *surprised*, why not, Sir?
SS: Because the university has no funding for MS students. Only for the faculty, and the PhD students.

SS: **after a prolonged silence, in which he kind of understood that I'm not able to dole out 1-1.5lakh rupees for a conference on my own** ... But you can go to a local one
Me: Any would do, really. When one is at coordinate (0,0), even (0.01, 0.01) is a start. [thought that last bit to myself, didn't say it]
SS: Well, here is one. Here you can get published. [and he showed me the conference page of a local one]
Me: Oh, will I get published here?
SS: 90% chances, that you will.
Me: *skeptically*, really? But.. how can you be so sure?
SS: Well, you see, conferences are a business - right?
Me: Err, yeah?
SS: Of course! You accept as many papers as possible, hold a conference, get your cost of hosting covered by the registered presenters! After all, you have to invite the keynote speakers, give them air travel, accommodations, give everybody gifts... how would you cover all this cost?
Me: *silent*.. Okay.
SS: So basically, reviewers who know each other, won't really refuse the paper. It's a business and friendship thing. Works everywhere.
Me: Sure.

So much for 'original research, contributing to the field and to science, and to human-kind' ..

I'm so disappointed today. It's like, academics is staring back at me with a smirk and saying, 'Aur ghusso iss tableau mein.. samjh nahi aya ab tak that it's all a game?'

Friday, September 9, 2011

Problems in the Brain


Warning: Insensibility Alert. Ramble Alert.

The day dawned cloudy. Clouds generally rock. Today, they were just depressing. Yesterday and today morning were dedicated to chotu. Since he has now taken to just hitting anything within sight, my mood wasn't better by today morning. In fact, I had been so sick of all the punching, kicking, pinching, knee-first-jump-on-tummy... that it was a lot difficult to control my temper. Er, I know you can't blame the kid.. but at least you can get angry and feel miserable.

That's what I did.

Bad move.

The morning started at 8.15. Hoping against hope that Bhanju wouldn't wake up, I crept to the laptop. This 8-10am time slot is one which I look forward to - the entire day. Who wants to miss such a great time? Five minutes after I sat down, the kid woke up... and I heard, 'aalaaa?' ... Oh man, oh man. I looked around in despair and there he was, in his T-shirt and diapers.. [what a night suit :P] and he jumped down fast from the bed.. hurried towards me, held out his arms and said 'po-po? booo' .. [chotpo plays with him with balloons actually]...

Sighing audibly, I picked him up and resumed my work.. Hardly a second later, I had let out a cry of surprise. The whole backside of the shirt was WET!! Yuckieeeee.. :P

Got up .. glared at the blissfully asleep Mommy, and tried to wake her up. She informed me that I can easily change a diaper, gave me instructions to take out some clothes and change the amused toddler. Sighing again, i set to work. After that, sat down in front of the laptop again. Hardly a few minutes later, the kid was running around, creating a general mayhem, and then opened the door (yeah he can manage that..:(..), and calmly ran out.

Got up AGAIN, and ran after him. Looked hopefully at his nani, whether she would see to him, glared at the sleeping mommy again and found out that the nani was nearly dozing off! :(:(.. So there was no hope. Only too soon, Dad woke up and asked for breakfast.. and took the kid for a while. But I had gotten up to make breakfast. Chotu had set up a chant of 'andaa' .. 'andaaa'... so I made 'andaaa' (egg)..

And he never ate it!! :@

**my typing is a lil more desperate right now**

Cursing everything under the sun, I sat back down .. and tried to continue working. Ha!! Dad was so overwhelmed after trying to feed the kiddo, that he called me to take him, while he eats. Sighing again, I took him and tried to amuse him. Then, a lil while later, Dad finished breakfast and sis the priss finally woke up.. Took him for breakfast. It turned out that he didn't eat the 'andaa' cuz the 'andaa' had been fried wrong.. :(. He eats half-fry, the lil nawaab.

Then asked sis the priss for a favor, which wasn't granted. Fuming, I went back to the laptop and tried to calm myself down. Failed.

Later, I just got up and stormed off. No use trying to please everybody. It doesn't work.

We had a cool breakfast of halwa puuri (sis the priss made halwa and I made puris), and then we sat down, and tried to calm ourselves down, but it was hard. Cuz chotu potu was in the high chair .. uff.. making a MESS out of the puuris or bread which was given to him. I don't know, are all kids like this? Sis the priss says all toddler boys are like that.

*wearily*. It was a hard hard morning.

Then, had to cook in a huge hurry, since one of my friends (who lives in the UK), leaves tomorrow morning .. and we had planned a get together, so it had to be done in a hurry today scowling throughout the cooking session, I was feeling like ditching the get together ! :@ [who wants to be social when one feels like a moronic turnip] ..but then realized that F leaves tomm.. so I wont be seeing her for a long time!

We went to a mall and had all five of us had a wonderful time. Ate chinese.. and had juices.. :) and then went into the gaming section. Had a superb time there. Forgot completely about my lousy morning and mood... I can shoot pretty okay, you know! SA was awesome in shooting :D. MA.

Then went on to air hockey (? is that the name of that game?).. I was playing it for the first time, and man, did we have fun or WHAT .. :D. My team won by a larrgee margin the first time .. [:P to SA].. and then, er, second time, I was moronic.. ;). Lost by a small margin.. [another :P to SA]..


Sigh. It was a great amazing evening.

Came back.. fell asleep :(. Woke up. Have a nasty headache right now... And i know sleep wouldn't come easy. Problems in the brain have the tendency to land you into the fuzoolest of spirals, and once you get into the spiral, the only way forward is DOWN. I myself am in a spiral - wondering when will I hit rock bottom, and then probably, the way forward will become UP.

Or most hopefully: OUT and back to normality. If I even remember what normality is.. :S... [Was it a Gaussian thingie? .. *surely crazy right now*]

Burdened hearts aren't easy to deal with. You can pray and hope things become better, but problems in the brain prevent solutions to be implemented to heal the burdened heart.. and matters usually become worse.

May Allah Help us all. Ameen.

Romance in Islam - Lecture Invite!

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Lectureshop facilitators:
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Date: September 25th, Sunday

Timings: 12:00-5:30pm

Venue: Crystal Ballroom, Marriot Hotel, Karachi

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Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Rain in Karachi


At last. It happened. The rivers of sweat and more sweat finally paved way for er, rivers of rain-water. :$. For all those who live in rainy or 1st world regions, please stop smirking. This is kind of embarrassing. We Karachites love rain, yet, not 5 minutes pass, that we start cursing it :S

The same happened today. For the past few days, we had been scorching in the intense beyond intense heat. It became normal to be sweaty all the time. It became normal to breath in 'hot air'.. It was terrible. And this is coming from a non-working person who was mostly in the home. *huge sigh*.

So anyway :). The rain was awesome today. We went out to pick up a few gifts and it was drizzling. I hurriedly picked up an umbrella (aeween mai) when I went out. The cool bit is that the rain kept on increasing, much to my glee and much to mum's worry :P. The spattering sound on the car's roof is one of the best sounds in the world. When we were moving towards the shopping center (which is like 30 mins drive from our place), the clouds were BLACK - literally. And very ominous.

The excitement growing, I sat back to enjoy the ride :). When we finally reached the shopping place, we missed the shop and began a looong wayyy to the 'cut' to double back and come to the right place. As mum complained later, we could have simply stopped the car, gotten out and crossed the road.. at least we wouldn't have been caught in this....


Or this...

We haven't had much experience in dealing with this kind of rain pouring on our heads. As I stepped out of the car with mum, the downpour felt like somebody has emptied (and is keeping on emptying) a bucket of cold water straight on our heads. Trying to shield Mum more with the umbrella (have you noticed that the first instinct is to protect one's own self with an umbrella in a downpour? :$), I splashed over to the footpath. Mum hurried along, scolding all the way :D:D..

Sorry, but it was hilarious. Everybody watched us with amusement, because everyyybody (nearly) had gotten in a shade and were 'watching the downpour, with eyes glazed over' [please don't smirk you rainy region dwellers].

Finally, we reached the shop, and left wet patches on their clean floor :D.. Lol. We looked like soaked hens. Then, me hurried to the english books section, and mum hurried along, trying to find good urdu ones.

I got some for myself too :$. But hey, its a good bargain... and **suddenly makes a resolve**.. will Insha Allah post interesting bits from those books as I read along.. IA!

Anyway, our purchases made, we stepped out, relieved that now the downpour had converted into a steady trickle (like when the shower is slowly running) .. and walked to the car. Uffff.. I couldn't believe the scene which greeted my eyes. The road, which had been decently wet...had turned into a river!!

Mum said 'What's so surprising about that? This is Karachi!' ... :(:(

Khair, we left that place slowly... but shukkar Allah ka we didn't get stuck in jam.. any jam in fact. Probably because it was still early (around 4.30ish, 5ish time).. There have been people today who have gotten stuck BIG TIME in the traffic jams - and returned home in 4-5 hours :(.

Then went to pick up Chotpo.. :). **suddenly exhausted of writing**.. I dunno why I've turned into a 'writing-chore' now... why has writing become such a chore.. :$.

So long!

Take care all!

Finally, just to make you smile.. :) .. the following picture was forwarded by Dad.. as a reminder that bhanju wanju was once upon a time, THIS SMALL!!!!

Everybody say Masha Allah Masha Allah Masha Allah :D ... *nehaal 'aalaa'*